Wherever You Will Go.

I was 12 years old. And i was in my last year of primary school. I took part in this after school club and I remember going out of the school gates and finding my Dad standing there. I knew something was wrong from that moment as my Dad worked until 7pm every night so except for the very rare day off I would always walk home with my friends. I remember looking at his face and instantly knowing something was wrong.

The news he told me broke me. I knew my Nan was ill, but my Nan was my best friend, I could never have imagined her not being there, not being there to talk to, dance with or even just to see smile. She had the most cheeky smile. The afternoon I was told that she died I will never ever forget. I went into my room and just broke down. I hated that there was nothing I could do to help, and there was nothing that I could've done to stop it. We all just had to grieve in our own way, and support each other where necessary. I cut off all communication with my friends, family; I didn't talk to anyone for days. I just couldn't believe it. If she wasn't in my life anymore I didn't want anyone else to be. I felt like my whole world had come crashing down around me. I could have won the lottery that week and I wouldn't have cared. I would have (and still would) trade all the money in the world for her to come back into my life.

Since then everything I have done I have done to make her proud. And I hope I have. There isn't a day where I don't miss her. This week will have been 9 years since she died, and I will never forget the day it happened. But I also know that she's watching over me, saying how proud she is of everything I have accomplished and I know that she will carry on to watch over me as I grow older.

I know we'll meet again one day Nan, but until then, you are forever in my thoughts and my heart, and I hope I make you proud.
P.S. I've even grown my nails for you. I know how much you wanted me to do that when you were around. Now I can wear your ring and it looks beautiful. ♥